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Ted Movie Review: Great Jokes But Too Disney-ish

Written by Alexander Tucker   // 07/05/2012

TedTed Movie Review: Awesome, off color jokes but slow plot line and too many Disney moments.

Outside of a Jewish kid getting beat up in the streets of Boston, the movie ‘Ted’ starts off fairly Pollyana-ish. It is Christmas 1985 and we learn about a boy named John Bennett who receives a talking teddy bear on Christmas morning. ‘Ted’ starts off fairly slow, but I guess it is all necessary to establish the bond between John and his bear.

We fast forward to current day and learn that John Bennett (Mark Wahlberg) and his teddy bear are now grown-up pot smoking roommates. John has been in a four-year relationship with beautiful and successful Lori Collins (Mila Kunis). John is a very down to earth, kind guy who works at a car rental office.Ted

Lori is frustrated that John and his teddy bear sit around smoking pot so much, and advises him to grow up and get rid of Ted. Ted moves to his own apartment and gets a job at a supermarket where he ends up sleeping with a White trash girl named Tami-Lynn. Never mind the fact that Hasbro never gave Ted a penis, because he manages to incorporate some produce into the relationship.

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At one point in the movie there is a hilarious fight scene between John and Ted. I must say that was one of the high points in the movie, which makes me wonder if Mark Wahlberg is just much better suited for action flicks.

Nothing is off-limits in ‘Ted.’ There are Asian jokes, hooker jokes, and even 9/11 jokes. If you appreciate inappropriate and non-PC humor, then you will love the jokes.

Outside of the hilarious, off-color jokes in the movie, the plot line is rather slow. At certain points it felt like I was at a Disney movie about a boy and his teddy bear. Perhaps a better name for the movie could have been, “Teddy Bear Capers.”

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The humor in the movie was awesome, but there seemed to be too many gaps between the jokes; and with a poor storyline, the movie struggled at points.

The guest appearances from Flash Gordon and Ryan Reynolds were rather enjoyable. And ‘Ted’ has some great high points that made the entire audience laugh uncontrollably.

I do recommend the movie, but be prepared for some Disney moments throughout. I do wish the movie had more rated R moments. I have thoroughly outgrown kids’ movies, and didn’t appreciate those moments in ‘Ted.’

‘Ted’ Red-Band Movie Trailer:



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